First time I cooked

Hi friends, I believed you are doing great and your week has been awesome. 
You see cooking is one of my favorite past time, I love to cook unless I am practically lazy to do so. But my induction ceremony into the cooking university was a disaster, Lol

You see I grew up with grandma. She was an unconventional grandma, whose philosophy about life and child rearing was on another level. She doesn’t buy into the notions of only girls learning and knowing how to cook, doing house chores and handling laundry while exempting the boys. Nah not when you are staying with grandma. She made sure a child of any gender under her care knows how to cook and such are brought up with home keeping skills.Every child under her care was taught domestication and home keeping.

Every one of us living with her then knows how to use the rocky grinding stone to grind pepper, locust beans and anything grind-able. Thats why I am somehow appalled when many millenials find it outright stressful and a time consuming activity using the grinding stone, oh well what do I know?.

 And to encourage us especially in the cooking department, we are often showered with affectionate and encouraging words like ” no matter how awful the food anyone of us cooked, no one is permitted to raise objection to eating it!”. And sure enough the idea of not sure whether your food will bee eaten no matter how horrible it may turn out is settled 

Prior to my first time of cooking real meal, I had always been engage in the background process of buying things, grinding stuffs and general errands in the kitchen. I was the last born so fortunately those ahead of me agewise has been  tasked and perfected their skills of cooking great food which I relished.

A day came; I can’t recollect what happened. Perhaps the person whose turn it was  to cook that day was sick or something. Grandma practically came to grab me from where I was playing football with street mates, show me around the kitchen, instruct me to cook dinner and then walk out of he kitchen.

She had expected me to make use of the knowledge I have gathered while hanging around the kitchen ,which she thought should be sufficient enough. It was a rather mild drastic decision. To increase my confusion,  none of my siblings were allowed into the kitchen until I was through.

 I was about to concort a terrible concortion if only she knew
Cooking process

Light the stove- check

Parboil the beans, rewash and precook- check

Empty the striped corn into the pot mix – check

Add spices and condiments – sparingly check

Add palm oil – grudgingly check

Add salt – fearfully check

Result: An oversaturated oily and salty dinner – a disaster

I ecstatically ran to grandma to inform her that I was through. Her reaction when she tasted the dinner was da bomb!. She refuses to make comment but gently pat me on the back and dished out the content into everyone’s place without giving out her emotion

The reactions that ensue when each of my elder siblings  took the first spoon was hearbreaking- they began to concorts their faces as if they have just been slapped. Their teeth ached and then they all ran outside after each other to spit their mouth content out.

© google

I was alarmed, what I have done? I thought
Grandma nudge me to take a spoonful myself and then I had a revelation! Hahaha. I wanted to run along with them, but grandma’s demeanor and stance wouldn’t allow me bulge. I dare not stand up from my seat. I had to grudgingly swallow the gulp but internally I was crying.

© google

Everyone behaved when they saw grandma stern look. Those days, a look is enough to silent your tantrums, lol. Your brain will automatically receive sense to behave, hahaha

That night everyone grudgingly ate in silent and went grumpily early to bed.  I was not to be allowed to the kitchen until about 7 months later.

So how did the food you cook at your first try out turn out?  What was the experience like?

Feel free to share in the comment box


Every blessings,


D’Dream (2017)  Copyrights Reserved


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30 Comments Add yours

  1. Nedoux says:

    Gosh, I couldn’t stop laughing, @ sparingly, grudgingly and fearfully check XD

    Lol… I love your grandmas style of training, it inspires early independence.

    My induction ceremony into the Kitchen University was also a salty disaster, it was rice. Cooking is one of those skills that gets better with practice.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. D'Dream says:

      seriously it wasn’t funny at the time but boy has gotta do what boy’s gotta do with fear almost breaking out of my ribcage.
      Yeah…. that’s how I’d train my children too and like you said it inspires and instills the discipline necessary for independence
      @ My induction ceremony into the Kitchen University was also a salty disaster. Lol . that means I wasn’t the only one in the salty business at the induction ceremony
      Thanks for the insightful comments

      Liked by 1 person

  2. 'seyi says:

    Yee😂😂😂😂😂😂😂, over saturated indeed. Love your grandma style by d way, no wastage.


  3. Tamie says:

    Lol. Funny.

    For some reason I can’t remember my very first meal but I remember my dad complimenting my efforts in my early cooking days.
    I do remember the first time I lit a stove sha. It was hilarious. I was afraid of fire /matches.. So would always strike the matches, throw it at the stove wick and run away.
    Other funny kitchen related firsts for me were, first time I went shopping for food items all by myself and first time I was made to buy and bring home a live chicken 🐔 (drama!!) . Lol

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Seriously it wasn’t funny then though, 😁.
      I thinks why I remember vividly my first time at cooking was probably because of the drama that ensue, Lol. It is okay not to remember

      What method of lighting a stove is that? Really hilarious. 😂

      Really? Live chicken?! Oh boy, That’s something! Lol. The drama no go get part 2

      Thanks so much for sharing your experience with us. Very much appreciated

      Have a wonderful weekend

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Tamie says:

      A pre-teens method. Lol

      Liked by 1 person

    3. D'Dream says:

      Mine would have been as a result of watching too much kung fu, Lol

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Bisola says:

    This is just too funny and nicely told.
    Your grandma was so nice. Is she still alive? Some other person would have insulted or scarred you for life with the kind of tonguelashing you would have gotten. But she took it all in her stride. Your siblings got no chill. Lol at them contorting their faces. That salt must have been badh.
    When you say “everybody grudgingly ate in silence”? You mean ate the beans? Chai.
    I can’t remember the my first cooking experience sha. I guess it wasn’t memorable because I wasn’t a great fan of cooking when growing up. Most likely when I eventually cooked, it was something simple. I really can’t remember.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Really? Thank you! 🙌

      Nope, she is late but I owe her a lot! She was a great and phenomenal personality, she was the best grandma anyone could have.

      Dont mind my siblings, hehehe. They often taunt me sometimes about that episodes every now and then.

      Yes we all ate it o! It wasn’t funny then because grandma detest food wastage. The truth is the food wasn’t overtly salty though, just that mine was a little over the top of household salt intake range.

      That’s okay. At least it wasn’t a disaster as mine.

      Thanks so much for your comments, have a wonderful weekend


  5. zaram says:

    Lol. My first cooking experience apart from noodles was actually cool.
    Turned out better than I thought it would. Only thing was that I had fried the stew with too much oil. I now had to be draining the oil out before others came. So no one witnessed the oil bath I had earlier made. Dad even commended me. I think he half expected that I’d burn down the house.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Your experience was really an interesting one and I was about to begins imagining the red oil bath scene, 😁. I like your dad, he is cool.

      Liked by 1 person

    2. zaram says:

      Hehe. Thanks. The oil bath wasn’t so bad o🙈. Yeah I love my Dad.


  6. aditi says:

    Seems to be out of those Tom Sawyer stories:D

    Liked by 1 person

    1. D'Dream says:

      Thank you! For reading and commenting

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Elizabeth says:

    I think my first cooking was on my tiny toy stove where I made excellent amazing(in my mind)food. Of course, only I could see the food!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Most times, it seems our first food cooked is somehow always a disaster.


  8. A. Blake says:

    First of all HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! It was too long ago when I made my first meal because growing up in the 60s we started cooking early in our lives.

    Liked by 2 people

  9. this was so hilarious! Love it

    Liked by 1 person

    1. D'Dream says:

      Thanks dear. Its exciting to have you here


  10. The jellof rice was dual, white on one side and jellof on the other side of the pot.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      LOL. Ha! there was a great partitioning like the red sea phenomena 😉 Thanks for dropping it in your experience. have a fabulous week


  11. Courtney says:

    Great story! This wasn’t my first time, but I do remember one incident where I tried baking cookies and it went completely crazy. I must have added salt instead of sugar, because when I tasted the dough, it was completely salty. We ended up tossing the mix because the dough was runny and tasted all wrong. I could definitely relate to the memes thinking back to that experience! 😄

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Ha! Nice one, salty cookies😁😁.
      You are lucky your mum was with you though. Thanks for the comment


  12. Awesome story !! Your grandma sounds amazing – I love her and don’t even know her lol lol ; )
    My husband has always loved to cook and he is better than I am in the kitchen.
    Your grandma’s wisdom and perspective has obviously blessed you and your siblings.
    Blessings to you ~

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Lolz, seriously . grandma was pack full brim of awesomeness. .😁
      Ha! Lucky you for a hubby that likes to cook. Some of my female friends don’t buy the idea though. Their reason? He won’t appreciate their cooking skill.
      Thanks for dropping by! I love reading your comments


  13. Love the pic and marvelous entry

    Liked by 1 person

    1. D'Dream says:

      Thanks ma’am . I guess you don’t wanna share, its okay though .😁

      Thanks for the comment too

      Liked by 1 person

  14. IsM says:

    Hahaha … It’s was really a pretty awesome experience,hehehe!!
    Well,if you ask mine it was just a disaster just like yours but thankfully my mom was there to help me out 😝

    Liked by 2 people

    1. D'Dream says:

      Lucky you!!! 😀😀. Thanks form the comment too, now I know I wasn’t alone!

      Liked by 1 person

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